WW Check In: Hanging In There

I have to confess, after the weekend I’ve had, I did not expect good news when I stepped on the scale this Wednesday.

As an emotional eater, I certainly put away a decent number of Snyder’s Hot Buffalo Wing pretzel pieces, my current not quite WW approved obsession. The day my cat died, my boyfriend took me out to lunch, where I consumed an entire sadness pizza. (Thank you, Andy. It was exactly what I needed).

But, I continued to track my food and, after that first hard day, tried to channel my grief into healthier outlets, including:

• Crying while running 
• Crying while doing yoga on Artemis’ favorite mat
• Crying while taking long walks with fantastic, supportive friends
• Falling asleep with an episode of The Mindy Project in the background

I know myself enough now to know that I have a tendency to wallow, so it’s been project Keep Amanda Busy (and active). This week, I went to Dave and Busters and had drinks with a friend and went to yoga. Normally, I hate having plans every night of the week, but I have to say, this feels much better than sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

Three years ago, the last time I grieved a loss, I primarily laid on the couch crying and eating. It took weeks before a friend dragged me out to yoga (where, yes, I cried). No shame on past Amanda, but I think the law of motion applies here–the more I sat still and felt sorry for myself, the sadder I got. It’s a vicious cycle. 

This time around, I’m keeping moving while still allowing myself space to be sad. And the byproduct of that is that I’m down another pound and feeling strong, sore, and healthy. 

Here’s to taking the tender time you need when you need it and finding a variety of coping strategies, not just food-based ones. And here’s to occasionally eating an entire pizza when you’re having the worst day, because hey, balance.